Newfie June - It Runs in the Neighbourhood




We have been living in our little cul-de-sac for more than fourteen years now. Most of the original neighbours are still here so needless to say, we are a close bunch of friends. Most of us have stayed here just because we like our neighbours so much.

We were closer to the couple next door at one point because our children were of similar ages and we had a lot in common. Now, the couple who live a few doors down, Jim and Janice, have become particularly close. We are empty nesters and they still have pre-pubescent boys (the fun is yet to come for them) but we have a lot of fun times together. Their kids regard us as an extended aunt and uncle and to be honest, I wouldn't have it any other way. Funny how their age was so trying a time when our girls were there, but we can really enjoy their boys. Maybe that's because we can go home to our quiet, empty house at the end of the night. Or perhaps it's for that very reason; we live in a quiet, empty house and we miss the spontaneity of having children around.

Anyway, we usually do things that include Jim, Janice and their boys. One night, however, we booked an adults night out. We were going to a nice restaurant for dinner and then to see Jann Arden in concert. Our neighbours came over to our house and we all got into our car to head out on our adventure. I was the driver, my husband rode shot-gun and Jim and Janice climbed into the back seat. They were snapping on their seatbelts when a strong odor filled the car. All I could think of was that Janice was wearing a new perfume. Sometimes people go crazy with the atomizer and in a confined space it can be overwhelming. I was starting to have a raspy tickle in the back of my throat from the irritation but didn't know what to say as I didn't want to insult her. As I put down my window slightly I commented that someone was wearing perfume tonight. What an understatement! After a while I either got used to it or it dissipated somewhat. I made sure I didn't sit right next to Janice at the dinner table or the concert, though. I did notice her several times throughout the night, however, rubbing at her hairline. She wasn't quite scratching, per se, but it looked like something was causing her some irritation. I wondered briefly if she had put on too much hairspray or something.

Anyway, the concert was great and the ride home gave me no problems at all. I had totally forgotten about the whole incident. Then one day, several months later, Janice came over for a visit. We got to talking about the concert and suddenly Janice said she had something to confess. Sheepishly, the story came out about her abhorrent grooming that night.

Before we go any further, it is essential to know that Janice is as blind as a bat, without her contacts in or glasses on.

Seems that on the evening in question, she showered as usual. She then blew her hair dry and decided to add a little hairspray, which she usually doesn't wear. She picked up the spray bottle and spritzed away. She finally dressed, put in her contact lenses and put on a touch of make-up. All was good until they got into our car. She thought the comment about the perfume was odd as she hadn't used any. She thought that maybe I thought one of our husbands had used too much after shave. About an hour later, she noticed that her scalp felt like it was burning. She put up her hand to rub the edge of her hairline and actually felt pain. Her scalp became increasingly sore and irritated throughout the evening. Janice could not, for the life of her, figure out what was wrong with her head. She vowed she would never use hairspray again, that's for sure.

When they got home that night, Janice took the bottle of hairspray to look at it. She wanted to make sure she never purchased that brand again! As she looked at the plastic bottle, her memory finally kicked in. She had been using a tile mildew remover, several weeks before. The spray nozzle on the cleanser plugged and could not be cleared; so she poured the remaining mildew remover into an empty hairspray pump bottle. You can imagine the rest. No wonder her scalp burned! For crying out loud…she's lucky she had any hair left by morning.

For those of you who read my last article called The Neighbourhood Beauty, you can see why I chose the title of this piece.

© Newfie June




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