Micheline's Put-in
 
Taking a back seat!
One of the great things about life is that things are continuously changing. Change will bring on a shift in perception. A shift in perception brings about new ideas, which basically give us something different to talk about. This is especially refreshing for writers, otherwise we would all be out of a job….
As I mentioned in a previous article, I am pregnant. At forty years old, I'm having my first child. Aside from the obvious, I'm experiencing various perception changes: getting a better understanding of what people are like in this city.
I don't own a car so I'm forced to deal with public transportation. On nights when I choose to stay at my apartment, I take the commuter train to work. Otherwise, when I stay over at my boyfriend's house, I take the metro (subway).
When I began to show (which was at about 3 months), I attempted to "test" Montrealers. The obvious test to me, was giving up ones' seat for the pregnant woman.
The train: People on the train come in from the West Island which is the home of many middle class families.
Since I get on at the last stop before downtown, the train is always full and no seats are available. At the time when I did the "test", though I had already gained 20lbs, I did not feel any urgency to sit. The extra weight was mostly concentrated on my front area. Just to give you an idea, I normally weigh 112lbs and am 5'2" (and ¾). Adding 20lbs to my tiny frame made me look 7 months pregnant. I felt this was perfect. So, I put the commuters to the test. On several mornings, as I would sloooooowly step on to the train, gently patting my belly, I waited to see how the commuters would react. On several accounts, people sitting down would notice me and quickly shift their heads to what seemed to be avoiding eye contact. These particular people never gave up their seats. There were two occasions when I was given a seat. In both cases, the seats were given up by women. In case number one, she hesitated a bit, then reached her hand out to me and asked if I wanted to sit. Because I truly did not need the seat, I declined her offer, but loudly and clearly, thanked her and told her how her actions were appreciated.
In case number two, the woman initially acted like all others, avoiding eye contact and pretending not to notice me. However, my belly was literally at her head and I felt that I must have been making her crazy. I got as close to her as possible. She was seemingly trying very hard to read her book. At one point, she noticed her friend walk in who had no choice but to stand behind me. The lady sitting was, therefore, forced to notice me and my big belly (which was bigger at this point since I did this "test" when I was 5 months pregnant, in order to chat with her friend. After chatting with her friend for a few seconds, she finally looked me in the face and asked if I was pregnant. I acknowledged that I was. She then asked if I wanted to sit. I hesitated. I WAS tired (I was coming home from work). However, my vindictive side (which we will blame on hormones) wanted to pay her back. Part of me was feeling that the only reason she was giving up her seat was because my belly was in the way of her chat with her friend. Then the nice person in me figured that she still had a choice and did opt to give me the seat, so I graciously took it.
The metro (subway): A potpourri of people that, depending on the time of day, will vary from low to middle class.
People on the subway reacted differently. Though once again only women offered their seat, it was done automatically - no hesitation. Like everything however, there are exceptions…
I was at the point where I actually WANTED the seat. I no longer needed to "play pregnant", it showed. Also, by reflex when in public, I protect my stomach by placing my hand on my belly. One would have to be pretty dense not to know that I'm "with child". I was waiting for the subway during rush hour. There were lots of people waiting with me. The train arrived, stopped, and we all piled in. As usual, everyone made a mad dash for any available seat. I did not get one. I ended up facing a middle-aged woman. From experience, it was generally this type of woman who would give up her seat. Not that morning. Since I was not feeling "up to par" her non-reaction was upsetting me (we'll blame it on hormones once again). There it was again, the annoying looking-straight-ahead, avoiding-eye-contact . "Oh yea?" I was thinking, "not today lady!!!". Though I was initially more to her side, I shifted my body so that I was directly in front of her. Short of closing her eyes, she had nowhere to look but at me OR my belly. It was hot and muggy that morning. No reaction out of her, she stood her ground. At a brief moment, she did look up at me. I was staring right at her. It wasn't pretty. Then I had a thought that maybe this poor woman NEEDED the seat herself. So I quickly turned my body around to the face the woman next to her.
This woman looked at my belly and from the corner of my eye (of course I was not looking directly at her because this would give me away), I could see her looking up at me. At least three times she would look at my belly then my face then back to her crossword. I could only assume that she was struggling. My "hormonal moment" had passed at this point and it was all I could do to not burst into laughter. How insane I felt. What made the situation even funnier was the reaction of the people standing. I must have had this sense of urgency on my face, that I truly needed to sit down. Many would look at my belly then to the people seated. It was hilarious. I figured that these people needed a good finish to this story. I began to rub my back so as to make it look that I was in pain. Then the tables got turned on me.
Two stops before mine, a seat became available. In order to get to it, I would have to squeeze past a person who was already seated, disturbing them twice within 4 minutes. Normally, I would have stayed standing. But I could feel this pressure from everyone around me to take the seat. I took the seat and quietly giggled to myself. At my stop, I decided to attempt to avoid any possible unpleasantries. I waited to the very last second, jumped out of my seat and darted out of the metro.
I realized at this point that this is what one gets in Montreal. I suppose that it's the big city syndrome. People fend for themselves. I was a little saddened by my discovery. My thinking is different and I suppose it's because I was raised in a small town. Why the difference in attitude, I don't know. All I can do is accept it.
© Micheline's Put-In
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